While the waves are crashing, I still have responsibilities beyond the parenting and household management, I freelance about 20 hours a week from home, I blog, I have three radio shows, and have even committed in the past couple of weeks to doing some fill-in work at the radio station. Last night we were watching the Karate Kid, there's a part where Mr. Miyagi throws Daniel into the ocean, into the waves, to teach him "balance." Never have I felt more akin to Ralph Macchio. I have been feeling worn down and WAY off kilter trying to figure out the trick to balance in the waves of real life. * I am not unique here, folks. I am not the first nor the last mother to have felt like this. I am not complaining, merely giving you a snapshot to relate to.
It is no coincidence that I found this article outlining the top five regrets people have on their death bed. No, I'm not dying. I mean, of course I will die, someday, but I'm not going for the morbid here. I have never been a proponent of "living each day like it were your last." I get the idea of it, but I'm not a fan of focusing so strongly on "the end." Instead, I champion living like you're ALIVE!!!!! Remembering the amazing gift you've been given, and LIVING it! I have regrets in life, and I am not a fan of them, so this list got me thinking about how to not have more of them. Here are the top 5:
1. I wish I’d had the courage to live a life true to myself, not the life others expected of me.
2. I wish I didn’t work so hard.
3. I wish I’d had the courage to express my feelings.
4. I wish I had stayed in touch with my friends.
5. I wish that I had let myself be happier.
When I read this, I was near tears at the start of my day. I try to take about 20 minutes to myself in the beginning of the day before everyone's awake. It's my quiet time, the time that I center myself for a day filled with people who need only me, and RIGHT NOW. I was worn down, and dreading the day, while number five stood there staring me in the eye, daring me to smile rather than cry at the stress I was feeling. I took a look at all that was around me, a house that (while rather messy) I LOVE, a family that I was desperate for, a husband who is working hard around the clock for our family (and at this particular time, in service of people who have experienced real devastation), all the knick knacks and paddy whacks a girl could ever want, and best of all... I AM ALIVE! In short, I have what many wish for. Yes, it is stressful at times, and sure, I have lost a lot of my personal freedom and I miss it sometimes, but I'm ALIVE. Tickin' away here, thinking thoughts, feeling feelings, living a LIFE. How awesome! That's a lot to celebrate. Instead of feeling like I'm drowning in the waves, what if I am a coal under pressure? I'm going to be a diamond and shine brighter. That's cool!
How are you doing today? Are you living like you're LIVING? When you peek at those top five regrets, what pops out at you? How could you shift your perspective today, so that you feel truly ALIVE?
** Yesterday we started a blog hop courtesy of my friends at Welcome Baby Care's It's My Baby Blog. We're sharing our best summer memories. It's still going on, and we'd love for you to hop around and share your own summer memories, either by commenting or linking up your own blog! Happy hopping!
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